Tuesday 7 May 2013

A Beautiful Dark (A Beautiful Dark, #1)

A Beautiful Dark (A Beautiful Dark, #1)A Beautiful Dark by Jocelyn Davies
My rating: 1 of 5 stars

A Beautiful Dark had an interesting premise, some great ideas, and is extremely disappointing.

Even though it's not very original, the idea of an agent of good and one of evil trying to win over a girl is good. With some slow burning romance, ass-kicking and an awesome heroine, it would be pretty perfect.

What we get is an unlikeable herione, way too much clichés, insta-love and a cheap Twilight-ripoff.

There is a checklist for crappy YA novels these days. Let's see if A Beautiful Dark can get all the checks!

- Unlikable herione

Check, check, double check. Skye is a whiny teenager. She's so very special, but instead of going all "Hell yeah! Let's go kick some ass!" she's just "Fuck my life. Fuck my miserable life. I have powers, ewh! I have a very crappy life. I have two hot boys who want me. Ewh. My parents died, fuck my life!"

Sigh.

She's also Bella Swan the Second. Look at these quotes:

"My skin looked even paler than usual."

Why do they all have to be so pale?

" "Okay, wait, I know you also said no presents," Cassie shouted above the music as we worked our way through the throng, "but I have no self-control." "You better not have spent-" "

Guess who also loathes presents, especially when people paid money for it? You guessed right, Bella Swan!

Also, she gets some kind of iPod adapter thing so she can listen to it in her car. Bella got a new radio for her car. Hmm. Must be a coincidence, no?


- Herione doesn't want her powers

Check. So, Skye's got some pretty awesome powers. I mean, control over the elements? Healing? Pretty badass. But instead she's just:
"I have powers! But fuck my life. It's so very different now that I know I have powers. I wish I'd get my old life back. But I have powers. Oh no!"

- Slutty best friend, not relevant to the plot

Check again!

"I never reacted this way to guys I'd just met. It was Cassie who was boy crazy."

Of course, Cassie's only there to make Skye look good. Also, without Cassie, Skye doesn't have a life.

- Love triangle with two guys, one the 'bad' guy, the other brooding and serious

Guess what? Check. So there's Asher, who's the bad guy and basically a fucking jerk. Why do they always have to think making the MC jealous is the perfect way to get her? Why? I'd be more like, "fuck off now, you've made your point clear." But of course it works. Sigh.

Then there's Devin. He's so very serious and brooding and in luurve with Skye.

- Stalking equals love

Of course, how could I forget? If someone stalks you, it means they are so very in love with you.

"You watch me sleep?" "Once or twice." He smiled.

So very creepy romantic. (Also, guess what Edward does? He watches Bella sleep too! Yay!)

"I know a lot more about you than you know."

Flattering, isn't he?

- 'Parent' who's always conviently away

Check. Aunt Jo is always going out to hike. So very convenient!

- (only add in case of wanting to rip off Twilight) The human boy who's hopelessly in love with our protagonist

There's Ian. He's so in love with Skye, because of course it'd be weird if only two guys fell for her! He's a lot like Matt (or what was his name again?) from Twilight. They're both in love with the main character.

So, A Beautiful Dark's got every single thing! Hurray!

Also:

I didn't feel any older on the day after my birthday than I had on the day before it.

You don't say?

Since he'd arrived, I was having a difficult time concentrating in all of my classes, but for some reason, history, with its rote memorization, had been the hardest.

Because when you're attracted to a guy you're supposed to fail all your classes! please note that this girl wants to go to Columbia.

[the teacher] actually blushed and patted her mousy brown hair that frizzed out in a crown around her face.

Why are teachers always displayed as ugly? Sure, at my school there are some who aren't exactly attractive, but also young teachers, and good-looking ones. So I don't understand why teachers (who are very important, by the way) are always displayed as old, ugly and naïve creatures.

So.. this wasn't really my cup of tea. Too much clichés, way too much. But since I already have the sequel, I'll read it sometime.



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