Friday, 3 May 2013

City of Ashes (The Mortal Instruments, #2)

City of Ashes (The Mortal Instruments, #2)City of Ashes by Cassandra Clare
My rating: 1 of 5 stars

Actual rating: 1.5 stars.

Oh God. Where do I even start?

So, first I want to make a statement. Stealing is NOT okay. Stealing is NOT okay. Plagiarism is a form of stealing and therefore also NOT okay. This woman, Cassandra Clare, is earning buckloads of money with J.K. Rowling's ideas. And that, once more, is NOT okay.

And boy, is Clare using Rowling's ideas. I've already gotten over the characters in my review of City of Bones. The prison of Silent City is a weak rip-off of Azkaban. (Great prison, by the way, when just about everyone is able to walk in! Good idea to lock the worst criminals in there!) Valentine is an even weaker rip-off of Voldemort. But where Voldemort was a scary,scary, really bad guy, Valentine is just laughable. Every time he treathened someone, I just wanted to pat him on the head and say: "It'll be okay, Vallie! Just reign in your little temper and count to ten!" I think it's needless to say that that's not a good sign.

Then there's Jace.

Of course we all know Jace's supposed to be a mini-Draco. But I also felt like Clare was trying to make Jace the new Adrian Ivashkov. But where Adrian was arrogant but cute, Jace is arrogant and arrogant. Sorry Clare, but once again I say:

Also, everyone in the story is supposed to have a troubled past. Y'know, we all got bruises and that shit. And for some reason, everyone with said troubled past feels the need to tell us right away how troubled their past was. But I guess Clare doesn't know how to give characters depth otherwise.

Then there's the writing. Oh God. Oh God oh God oh God. It was so bad. Clare still uses every word that just pops into her minde in a simile. Let me give you some quotes, huh?

Isabelle shrugged philosophically.

How does one shrug "philosophically"? Are you supposed to shrug and scratch your beard at the same time?

Eyes like burning ice, (...)

Ice can't burn. If you put a flame and ice togheter, the ice will melt. It won't burn.

(...) its sound of old iron, (...)

Since when does iron, or old iron, have a sound? It might have a sound when scraped over something, but I've never seen some old iron that would suddenly just go *screeeeeeeeeech*.

Isabelle's smile was like a whispered secret.


Her eyes were clear blue as glass, (...)

Glass isn't blue. Unless, of course, you've got colored glass, but somehow I doubt that was what Clare meant.

He looked like a lion in a trap.


The sky had turned to gunmetal (...)

Pretty hard to breathe like that, huh?

"You're starting to sound like a dolphin, do you know that? Stop."

... wut?

Then there's the plot, or rather, the way the story flows. Clare wants to put some sexy Jace/Clary moments in there, but she doesn't know how. So she does what?

"That's what I don't understand!" Clary burst out. "Why did she make you kiss me? The Queen, I mean. Why force us to do that?"

Because it's an easy way to make you kiss Jace! That's why!

I also wondered if there is being hinted at some Simon/Jace activity,

I would like that. Just leave the super speshul Clare Clary alone, guys!

I'll put the quote in a spoiler, due to.. spoilers. (even though the thing I'm going to spoil is painfully obvious form the start, but hey, whatever)

(view spoiler)[ Simon's drinking Jace's blood in this scene:
But Simon wasn't hurting [Jace] -not really- the pain that had started out sharp faded to a dull burn, pleasant the way the burn of the stele was sometimes pleasant. A drowsy sense of peace stole through Jace's veins and he felt his muscles relax; the hands that had been trying to push Simon away a moment ago now pressed him closer.

*wink wink* (hide spoiler)]

Clare still isn't good at giving hints. I quote from my review of City of Bones: And.. the predictability. I saw every plot twist coming. This might also be because of Clare. Every time she drops a hint, she doesn't just drop the hint but also dances in front of it, singing: "LOOK! A hint! A hint! Right here, you see?". She's still like that. Except she is now dancing nake- no wait, now that I think of it, I don't want that mental image.

Like the hints involving (view spoiler)[ Simon being a vampire (hide spoiler)]. Painfully obvious. Or this one:

(view spoiler)[ "Did the Inquisitor's son die? Is that why she's like this?" (...) "How did you figure that out?"

Because it's obvious! Too obvious!

I also think Jace isn't Valentine's son (this I already thought in City of Bones.) He's an angel, if I'm correct (which is why Clary always dreams of him as an angel). But I hear we're supposed to find that out in book 4. Oops! (hide spoiler)]

But, back to the writing. It was unnatural. For example:

"Then he just left Simon lying there, like some toy he'd ripped all the insides out of so he had no use for it anymore."

No-one talks like that! No-one! Especially not teenage girls!
Ugh. Ugh ugh ugh.

And for the second time that night, a shadow passed between [Jace] and death.

Well, damn.

This is Valentine talking to Jace:

"And you have that quality that causes others to give their lives for you without question."

What? I certainly never would give up my freaking life for that jerk! And I can't believe others would.

And poor Simon. Clary just keeps using him. But wait, Clary's speshul! So she can, right?


I think it goes without saying that I didn't enjoy this book. Well, it made me laugh, but for the wrong reason.

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